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How to Discipline a Child
By Anthony Kane, Md of Complete Connection Parenting
Today I want to discuss discipline and bad children. I want to point out that “bad children” are really a misnomer. Bad children are not bad. It is that they don’t know how to meet the challenges of life in a way that is socially acceptable. For example: when a child bumps into another child in the lunch line: If the child is a “good child” he will say “excuse me” and walk away or let it go. A “bad child” might take it personally, explode, smack the other child in the face and end up in the principal’s office. That is the difference between a good child and a bad child. A good child responds to what is happening in his world in a socially acceptable way. A bad child does not. That is a very superficial view. A lot more might be going on. It could be the bad child responds that way because he is being physically, emotionally, or sexually abused. It could be an older sibling is beating him up on an ongoing basis. Perhaps he is being bullied on the way to school and this is the last thing that pushes him over. It may not be an equivalent situation. But on a very simple level, the basic difference between a good child and a bad child, is that good children know how to handle themselves in socially acceptable ways. They respond appropriately in a way that does not offend other people. Bad children respond in way that gets them in trouble and causes problems for others. When you understand this, then giving consequences and discipline for a “bad child” requires that you teach him how to respond correctly. That is what consequences really are. They are teaching experiences that show your child how to behave properly in a situation where he is not behaving properly now. If your child is doing something wrong, you teach him how avoid the misbehavior. You use consequences or discipline to get him to adopt a new behavior pattern. That is all giving consequences is. It is a teaching technique. When you understand that, consequences take on a whole new light and they become very effective in getting your child to change behavior. Most parents who talk to me have problems with this because they don’t understand this very simple point. I have a video that reveals the # 1 secret of the mistakes parents are making when giving consequences effectively. I want to give you this video today. Go to http://ccparenting.com/discipline?10086 and you will find the one mistake parents make when giving discipline and how to change that and make your discipline more effective. |
discipline your child
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When I was 12 years old I lived with my grandparents. This was 1940's and my grandfather was 80. There was a leather strap, hanging from a shelf in the kitchen, that was aledgedly used for disipline. Also used for sharpening his straight razor. I was never hit with the strap,but I was made aware of it. Later, my mother,1 of 7 children told me that she only saw it used once on her brother.
Great intel.
Frederick
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This intel was contributed by akanemd
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May, 2012
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